Monthly Archives: December 2014
If superhero movies have taught us anything, it’s a team of awesome and capable characters are better than one when it comes to kicking butt.
Iron Man? Good. Iron Man plus Captain America, Hulk, Thor, Hawkeye, and Black Widow? Skadoosh.
Without teamwork, you are lost. And without Lost, we never would have known about the Dharma Initiative.
Actually, not sure if that’s a bad thing.
Anyhoo, here’s another list of badass movie characters you’d want on your team when trouble comes calling.
Occupation: Bounty Hunters, galactic lawbreakers
As Seen In: Guardians of the Galaxy (2014)
Pros: Rocket is a technological genius, hacker, escape artist. Groot is Groot. Cons: Rocket is homicidal, Groot is….well he’s Groot.
The Deal: It would be hard as heck to find a duo that did more damage on screen in 2014 than Rocket the Racoon and his houseplant/muscle Groot. Rocket is feisty, murderous and angry, and Groot is kind, gentle and strong. They’re the Odd Couple for the new century! Who wouldn’t want them on the team? Plus Groot can really bust a move.
Shining Moment: We are Groot.
Occupation: Game Show Contestant, Over thrower of Evil Governments
As Seen In: A bunch of those Hunger Games movies.
Pros: Expert archer, brave and selfless. Cons: Dates idiots.
The Deal: Not just another pretty face, Katniss is a plucky gal who doesn’t like to play games; especially when that game is a twisted reality show that’s a gory fight to the death. But Katniss took her first appearance on The Hunger Games and became a symbol of a strength and bravery, making her the perfect leader for a revolution. So if you need a team member to make a rousing speech, Katniss is the one to go to. Plus she can kill lots of bad guys with her bow and arrow. Winning!
Shining Moment: That flaming dress. All kinds of fabulous, girlfriend!
Occupation: Paranormal investigator, monster puncher
As Seen In: Hellboy (2004), Hellboy: The Golden Army (2008)
Pros: Practically indestructible. Cons: Smoker, eats a lot, cat person
The Deal: You want muscle? Hellboy has muscle to spare. It’s probably because he’s a demon from Hell. I hear most Hellspawn are pretty jacked. But it’s okay, he’s on our side. As a lead investigator for the Bureau of Paranormal Research and Defense, Hellboy has seen a lot of weird stuff, and has a huge assortment of weapons to combat weird stuff, so keep him fed and try to ignore his huge collection of pet cats, and things will be hunky and dory.
Shining Moment: Dropping a huge gear on Kroenen in Hellboy. Big time pwnage.
Occupation: LAPD Detective, suicidal loner
As Seen In: Lethal Weapon 1-4
Pros: Martial arts master, very good with guns. Cons: Uses lots of ammo, could be crazy, smoker.
The Deal: Look up loose cannon in Wikipedia, and you’ll see a picture of Martin Riggs firing hundreds of bullets at bad guys while destroying a ton of police and city property. He loves to break stuff. Like Hellboy, Riggs is pretty much indestructible. He’s been shot, stabbed, hit by cars, yet he keeps coming back for his weekly paycheck. Don’t let him show you that trick he does with his shoulder. Not pretty.
Shining Moment: Beating the crap out of Gary Busey in the first Lethal Weapon. You deserve a medal, dude.
Occupation: Doesn’t matter. He’s Morgan Freeman.
As Seen In: Wherever he is needed.
Pros: Have you heard his voice? Cons: Shut up.
The Deal: Whatever character Morgan Freeman plays is really good at what he does. From outfitting Batman to fixing a crippled dolphin, the man has skills. Use them!
Shining Moment: Didn’t you get the memo?
This is DVD Critics Corner’s 100th post. Thanks for reading.